Oh please.....

I am an open book, which mean to say my IVF planning is openly known by everybody. IVF to people is well known for its injection, so these days my friends and relatives tend to fond of asking me these questions: "it is tough? is it painful? It must be hard for you" and most ladies' favourite comment is : "if it's me I won't have the gut to inject myself".

Oh please... Ladies, trust me, you have the gut, you definitely have it if you are in my situation. We women have the willpower which we tend to underestimate ourselves, I myself can't believe that I have been injecting myself for coming 3 weeks too, I have to admit that it is painful and there will be bruises but my willpower told me this is all well worth it.

Anyway what I hate most is those ladies already have kid or even pregnant tell me if they face this situation they won't be able to do it. The fact is you don't have too so please.... don't let your unnecessary brings down our morale. For me, I still can handle the comment but I do have a limit, just treat I am petty but seriously I do need encouragement as it not easy going through all this alone (although my hubby is with me by giving me spiritual support).

Especially now, I need to have 2 jabs per day, morning will be suprefact of 0.2ml and night with gonalF of 1.50ml. The injection is easy, just have bear the pain and poke yourself, gonalF injection is much easier than suprefact properly because it comes in a pen form and the needle is much slimmer. I am not sure anyone have side effect from these injection, as for me I do have. For example, headache, thirsty, tiredness and bloating feeling.

The nurse told me among these 2 jabs, gonalF cost the most, by looking at the packaging it very obvious to tell us the price of it. Anyway my review is this coming Friday, guess next week will the Egg retrieval week. Can't believe the days come so fast :) , I was so worried hence was forcing my hubby to follow me to pray just now. I seriously hope my first IVF cycle will be my last.

The days are coming close..

My gonal-f jab will be coming soon, in fact next Monday is the day for my next review, whether can I proceed for Gonal-F will depend on that day.

You may wonder what is Gonal-F for; the Gonal-f come in a Pen injection form, it is used to help ovaries make more eggs. (source from http://www.fertilitylifelines.com/resources/gonal-frffpen.jsp).

My period has already came, so I believe properly another 1 week or so I can proceed for egg retrieval, but!! that is what I hoping for, actual fact still very much depends the scan and blood test I have to go through along the Gonal-F jab. For the pass 11 days of self injection all I can say is I used to it, including the bruise I got. However, I need to use ice to numb my skin else I will not dare to jab in my skin still.

Now I just hope, when I proceed for Gonal-F I wont have over reaction like developing OHSS which I had mentioned in my previous post, else it will be really wasting my money.

As for my hubby, I can tell he is as much worry as me, how can I tell? I just tell him I have headache, he will have a big reaction and ask in a anxious way, it is normal ? Are you okay? Although he did nothing much for this IVF program but his concern and loves are my greatest support.

I made it!

13th Feb was the official day I started my Suprefact injection. My appointment was in the morning and my hubby went with me. I was having mix feeling but more toward to nervous as I am not sure can I accomplish the injection myself.  While waiting at the reception, I am chatting with my friend on my phone and my hubby was observing around the NUH IVF center. He turned to me and told me they will give a red small bag and true enough I saw a red bag and next was my name been called.

If I remember correctly, the IVF nurse named Christine serviced me. She is really very nice and patience enough to go through with me step by step and demonstration on how to go for the jab. At the end of the demonstration, I need to go through the real injection by myself.

I have to tell you I am so so so nervous and scare! I was having jelly hand and every time I am nervous I tends to do thing in a quick manner. My hubby do not have the courage to jab for me, plus he is going to travel for work from tomorrow onward till April so I have to learn to manage myself. My action was so fast that my hubby has to keep remind me to slow down.

First I need to lift up my blouse to expose my tummy, next I will need to assemble the gears - needle (tuberculin syringe), alcohol wipes and the medicine (Suprefact). 

The injection step goes by below:

• I will need to open the alcohol wipe to clean the medicine top cap (a new bottle will have a metal cap on it, need to take out and will see the rubber cap)
• Push the needle plunger to ensure all air is out in the barrel
• take out the orange cap from the syringe, turn the medicine bottle about 45 degree and insert the needle in the middle of the cap (which is a rubber cap). 
• slowly pull the plunger down to fill the barrel till it reach 50 and remove from the bottle
• I will need to hold the syringe upright and flick with my finger if there is air bubble
• the the alcohol wipe to clean the tummy area which is 2 fingers away from your belly button
• Pinch the skin and inject. 
• Push the plunger down to release the medication
• the count to 5 before taking out the needle and finally wipe it with the alcohol wipe

I have to say the procedure is easy, the most difficult part is not the pain; it is poking yourself.  I really take a lot encourage to poke myself, i dare to say my pain endurance is quite high but it just quite difficult to purposely take a needle to poke your own fresh. Anyway, I mange to do it!!

This morning was my second jab, and I manage to do it all myself with a little guardian from hubby. It all went way just that I realise I got 2 needle bruises now...

result known!

YES!!! I am perfectly fine and ready for my next protocol which is injection!
my injection will start on 13th Feb, and properly will have my embryo extract out and transfer in mid March.
Now I just hope and pray hard i won't have side effect like OHSS.


So what is OHSS?

The medications (gonadotrophins) used to stimulate your ovaries during in-vitro fertilisation (IVF) or associated procedures for fertility treatment are designed to ensure that a reasonable number of eggs are obtained to maximise your chances of pregnancy. OHSS happens when too many ovarian follicles have developed in response to the usual dosage of medication. It is a result of the hormones produced by the ovaries in response to the usual dosage of medication. It is a result of the hormones produced by the ovaries in response to the drugs given.

OHSS is usually mild and causes no more than a slight lower abdominal discomfort in most cases.

Although uncommon, it warrants medical attention as it can be potentially life threatening, if left untreated in severe cases.

When detected early and managed appropriately, the condition can be controlled. 


source from: http://www.kkh.com.sg/Services/Women/KKIVFCentre/Pages/OHSS.aspx

The waiting....

The journey of TTC teaches me an important lesson that is patience. Beside preparing your body for conceiving and BD on the right days next will be waiting and waiting. You cannot be anxious as it will affect your body. It is not easy not to be anxious especially when you are TTC-ing, a lot women especially those ever conceived before are not able to do so. It's easy to say "I am not nervous or anxious about it" but the fact is subconsciously our mind is actually always thinking about it.

Now, i am on the way for IVF and the main protocol of this procedure is WAITING too. I have to wait for my appointments, waiting for the test result, wait for AF to come and wait for the next process that the doc planned for you. Like now I am waiting for my test result to determine am I qualify to go for the program. What I can do is only wait and pray for the hardest that my result will be positive.

On the side note of waiting, I realise a lot people disapprove IVF. I am not afraid to tell people I am going for IVF, as I feel it is not a shame thing I am doing. In fact I am very proud of myself for decided to try IVF. A lot people told me it is not an easy procedure and always ask me am I scare. And recently I get to know a lot couples in Singapore have a negative thinking for IVF, I seriously don't know why and hope to find out the reason. A couple of ladies I spoke to say they are not mentally prepare and few will say they can't afford and what most disappointing is few give me an impression it is a shame to go for IVF. What about men? Why men rejecting IVF? Is it because not wanting to see their wives suffer?